I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
