Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
