just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
