It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize