so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
