Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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