My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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