So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Is it because I queefed?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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