but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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