i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
