if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
