It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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