Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
