she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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