I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my gift to your gina
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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