Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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