i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
