Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize