You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
