The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
