it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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