This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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