I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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