I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
