What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
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