I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
