He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
