Nicole vs. Life
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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