hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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