seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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