Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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