That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize