It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
