it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
