Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
