Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
