I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
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It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
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Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
YAS. BRING CRAB.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
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