Even the bartender felt bad for me
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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