the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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