Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
