ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize