Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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