This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
