theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
