Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
