In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
You need a sexual gate keeper
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
