Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
