Soap is not a condiment
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
