i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I don't deserve a penis
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
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