Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
