roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
