it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
he fucked my hip out of place.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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